It's hard to keep up with this blog with the constant mood swings I am having and honestly when I feel good...I clean (it doesn't last long, cleaning or feeling good). Anyway...
Can I just tell you how much I love corn chips. They are the perfect snack. Salty, mellow, crunchy, low on the sugar, not-make-me-throw-up yummy! I need more.
Oh and Nikell is at that age when it is soooooooooo funny to run away whenever I ask her to do anything. She poops and says, "Pooh pooh." And I say (quite logically), "Okay, let's go change your diaper." Now you must understand that in reality I am thinking, "Oh no not again! I can't do this. This time I will throw up, I just know it." Anyway, so I say, "Let's change your diaper." and that's her que to start running. Ha ha she is hilarious. I chase, we play, I pin her down, she squirms away, and all the while I am gagging and desperately trying not to lose my corn chips. This is not going to work. Have you ever tried to pin an-almost two-year-old down, rip off their pants and diaper without getting poop all over you and the floor, and breath in your shirt the whole time? It's kinda hard. So I give her a little more time to run around the house and spread the horrible poopy smell wherever she can. Then I try again. More running, more wrestling, more gagging. Aaarrgghh. Forget the fact that in the event that Jason is actually home during this time (you know, he works) he will wrap his legs around the chair he is sitting in, grab the handles, and refuse to have anything to do with a poopy diaper. Exageration? Maybe, but ask him how many diapers he has changed in his life. Honestly, though he is quite helpful these days. The man makes bread once a week! How can you beat that? He unloads the dishwasher, takes out the garbage, he even made peanut butter cookies today and plans to make gnochi's (sp?) tomorrow! So, you know, how much can I really bug him about changing the poopy, gaggy, diaper? I need an emergency diaper-changing hot-line. One where you call and when they hear the wretching they know they have exactly 7 seconds to get to my house, change the diaper, fumigate, and restore order. Okay, maybe restoring order is a little too much to ask.
10 comments:
Too funny?? I was really laughing while I was reading this, but also about ready to lose my corn chips as the detail continued. Glad it is not me. What would happen if I was PG?
I have soooo been there! And am so sorry that you are there now. I always told my hubby that it felt like I was in a constant stage of fear factor, when they had to eat something disgusting. I am sure that you can get the picture. Don't lose your corn chips! Love ya!
Totally been there. I feel for you! If you find that diaper changing service, will you please forward the info to me? I'd appreciate it!
I've become an expert at pinning a kid down to the floor with one leg, keeping hold of their squirmy legs with one hand and somehow changing the diaper with my remaining hand. Now, if I could only put that in a resume! Dennis' contributions to diaper changing consist of "You're doing great! Why should I mess up a good system?"
You are so funny. You always make me laugh! :) Sorry you are so sick...that's exactly how I was this last pregnancy- those yucky diapers about kill ya. GOOD LUCK with that! You better just make Jason just suck it up and take over for you..jk all the cooking/baking he does? WOW
I know I shouldn't laugh, but I have to admit I did sneak a smile here and there. Luckily I have never had to do diapers and pregnancy at the same time. I don't know if I could handle that :). I loved corn chips at the first of my pregnancy too. It felt nice to eat something that doesn't send you to the bathroom.
Corn chips, ick! I have been lucky enough to not be on the gag brigade, but there are certain foods that do NOT appeal and corn chips would be on that list today. Very funny post, by the way. I wouldn't dream of rubbing in that my almost 2 year old tells me his bum needs to be cleaned and lays nicely on the changing table while I clean him up. I would never dream of doing that!! Good luck!
I have to admit I was laughing - actually pretty hard as I read your post. Nothing is worse than changing a two year olds diaper. Well, there is something worse - changing a two year olds diaper while you are pregnant. Hopefully your baby is potty trained before the next one comes.
You're doing great JD! (um, do you still use that nickname? ha ha) I can't imagine doing it with three little ones. One baby and a almost grown 10 year old are hard enough for me!
I'm sorry :( Bleh...
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