This year it seems our primary program was destined to fail. It all began a month or so ago when my Primary Chorister partner quit. We had just had a meeting to begin our plan of attack on conquering the program. I went to church assuming it was her turn to teach. Needless to say, it was not one of the best Sunday's of my life...But, alas, we all must move forward. No problem, no big deal, we can do this.
As the program gets closer we start to nail down our speaking parts, our solo parts, the duets, the special numbers, those darn third verses. Then two weeks before the program one of our family's called and announced their intention to go to Park City the week of the program. No big deal right. Right, except that our 20 kid primary is now down to 18 and one of our solo's has just been eliminated and a trio will not have to be a duet. But, hey, no problem, no big deal, we can do this.
The Friday before practice another family had a death and will now be gone for the funeral. 18 down to 16. No problem, no big deal, we can do this.
Really we can. If I can remember to cue the kids when I am supposed to! Something I had not yet perfected on that Friday practice. Sierra was also scheduled to play a violin solo and has worked on it for months. The first time she tried it with the pianist she messed up and stopped. Dead. We talked a lot about just plowing through it, no matter what. She learned. She did it perfectly at home, but never in front of the primary. Nikell had a solo and Mialee was part of that aforementioned duet. And because I am a firm believer that primary programs should highlight kids and not be boring...we had a brother and sister duet singing "Love Is Spoken Here," a fun version of "I Want to Be a Missionary Now" where the kids took turns standing and singing different parts, sign language on "Stand for the Right" (with an added verse of President Hinkley's 6 Be's), and a slower more reverent version of "The Wise Man." Boring details to you, I know. But you have to try and understand the magnitude of what I was undertaking. It was either going to be fabulous or an epic fail. And with each passing month, week, and day I was leaning more toward epic fail.
At Friday's practice Nikell was quite ill (assumably gluten related). Saturday she did okay, but that night she was up a lot of the night crying and moaning. I was quite worried that she wouldn't make it on Sunday.
So what does it all matter? It doesn't really, except for this: My testimony has been strengthened. Saturday I started in on some pretty serious praying. Not the kind I had been doing all along, but the kind where I was having some pretty serious conversations, pleading my case, trying to make sure my heart was in the right place. I plead for Sierra. I wanted so badly for her first violin solo experience to be good and something that she could be proud of and not scare her forever. I prayed for Nikell. I wanted her to be able to stand and sing in that clear little voice of hers and touch hearts in only ways that she can. And I prayed that angels would surround us and lift us up and magnify our little voices. I prayed that people's hearts would be touched and their testimonies made stronger.
And guess what? It went fine. I wasn't nervous in the slightest. Okay, when they announced that another family had had a death and was in California at the funeral I may have panicked a little. But the older sister brought them. So, it went well and I was proud of those primary kids. One of my wiggliest kids sang her heart out the whole time and they all actually looked at me. They payed attention. They stopped singing when I signaled. They sat down when they were supposed to. And it was fabulous.
And later I heard Sierra discussing her violin solo with her Grandma Beddes and I think she mentioned how she had prayed about it. That's when I told her that I had prayed for her too. Grandma told her that a lot of people had probably prayed for her--and she did her solo PERFECTLY. And it was at this moment that I really stopped and was really grateful for a Father in Heaven who loves us. I know that it was only through His power that our program went off without a hitch. Now if I could somehow convey this to everyone else. It wasn't me. I am not amazing in any way. Those primary kids have faith. They come to church and sing and work because it's the right thing. And God loves them. And He loves little old me too. And that's what our primary program taught me.
