Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Sleep Habbits
I am considering attempting to change the sleep habits of my younger children. Call it an experiment. Call it lack of sanity. Call it sleep deprivation. Call it curiousity. Call it whatever you want. Anyway, before I do, though, I would like to conduct a little study about the average sleep times of children. Do you have kids? Do you know someone who has kids? Then tell me, what are their sleep habits? Nap times? Bed times? And Ages! You can even tell me about bedtime rituals or routines if you want. You can explain your fears and needs and "special circumstances" if you want too. Tell me whatever you want. I'll read it all. I have a theory... Not only about bed times, but about raising children in general. But, I'm not gonna tell you my theory until you give me the data I need!
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I have two kids. Jackson is almost 19 months. He goes to bed around 8 pm. At 8, he goes around the house and says “nigh nigh” to everyone and then we change his diaper, put him in pjs (he takes the diaper to the garbage) and then we read books. Then I put him in his crib tell him “nigh nigh” and give him a stuffed dog to hold on one hand put his blankies on him and turn on a stuffed animal music box. He then sleeps from 8 pm to around 7 am. He hasn’t always been a good sleeper but he is now and I LOVE IT.
Jasper has only been with us for a little over 2 years. He is 11 now. The first year and ½ I would say, he would wake up frequently during the night because he couldn’t sleep, was hungry, had a headache or a stomach ache. He also had to sleep with our door open, the hall light on and a small lamp on in his room. Luckily in the past 6 months he only wakes up infrequently with “headaches” and only has to sleep with the radio. We have to be downstairs near his room until he falls asleep however.
Oh - and Jasper has a ritual too - he goes to bed at 9 pm and reads for 1/2 hour. Then I go in and read to him too.
I'll be a guinea pig! We have 4 boys: 10, 7 1/2, 5 and 2 1/2. They have always shared rooms. I could never sleep with a baby in my room, so I just stuck the newest one in with his brother! From infancy my kids have not been huge daytime sleepers, and I encouraged it. Normally my newborns would take one or two naps a day (approx 1.5 hrs). By the time they were about 9 months that was down to 1 nap a day just after lunch. Around age 2 those naps usually turned into fighting times with me insisting they were tired, and them insisting they weren't. I quickly learned to just let them stay awake. That just made bedtime earlier.
Bedtime at our house is at 8:00, all ages. (sometimes even me!) Around 7-7:15 we begin putting away toys, putting on pajamas, brushing teeth, reading scriptures or working on memorizing an article of faith. It usually takes us until 8:00. We always have a last minute car race, one more thing to tell Dad and Mom about, one little story to read, one more trip to the bathroom, etc. At 8:00 we have family prayer and they go off to their rooms. Dennis and I split up between the 2 bedrooms. He says prayers normally with Allen (10) and Bryant (5) while I take Taylor (7) and Jaxon (2). The bedroom situation is still in it's experimental stages (we had to separate the older two because #3 felt left out of things). After prayers we usually will sing 1 song (nursery rhyme or primary song) with each boy, turn a cd of primary songs on low, and tell them "love you, goodnight". Then leave the room. Bryant needs a little more time, so Dennis and I will trade off laying down by him for about 5 min. Each room has a nightlight, so does the bathroom down the hall. The younger boys are usually asleep fast. Older ones take a little longer, but they stay in beds until they get to sleep. Of course we have occasional visits out in the front room with something important they forgot to tell us, but they go back to bed once it's been shared. Bedtime has never been a fight, and usually goes smoothly. They are up the next morning at about 6:20 to say family prayers before Dennis heads to work and to get ready for school.
Bed time is 7:30. We've always bathed our kids every night, which does take a little time, but we feel it ends the day for them mentally. Read scriptures and another short book, pray, and then bed. They often stay awake in bed for another hour or so and play or read, which we tolerate as long as they are quiet. Usually by 8:30, they are asleep, or if they're not, we make them stop what they are doing and then they usually fall asleep. Both of them have slept through the night, with very few exceptions, since they were a few months old. They usually wake up around 7:00 (goes in phases between 6:30 and 8:00).
The one annoying thing is that usually at least once or twice a night, before they go to sleep, they think they need one of us to come up and listen to something they forget to tell us, or get them a drink of water, etc. Not sure how to stop that little game.
Both of them took afternoon naps around 1:30 until they were 5. The older they got, the less strict we got about them actually sleeping.
Okay, so here's more details because I know you're dying of curiosity.
Around 7pm the kids get their jammies on and brush their teeth. As soon as they are done we read scriptures and then have family prayer. On a usual night the kids (ages 9, 8, and nearly 6) are in bed between 7:30 and 8pm. Millie (16 mos) usually heads to bed around 7pm. Matt and Millie go to bed right away, but the girls stay up talking until about 9:30 or 10pm. They have to be up by 7am for school and are pretty tired and miserable, but they'll be in their own rooms soon and I'm hoping that will eliminate their talking since they'll be at opposite ends of the hallway. Matt and Millie generally wake up around 7am on their own. Millie naps once or twice a day and Matt stopped taking naps when he was about two.
I'm very curious about your findings and can't wait to discover your theories. Maybe you can help me with the older girls.
We have one child who goes to bed every night (almost) between 10:00 and 11:00 and wakes up around 6:30 if his alarm is set, 7:20 if not. Each night he needs a bowl of cereal or he will lay awake until he has one. He falls asleep easy and sleeps through anything (except miscellaneous low volume electronic sounds and wood peckers pecking). It did take years for this process to start working like a charm. Prior to that, he stayed up late, got up early, tossed and turned and woke up many times every night, but rarely disturbed anyone else.
That jamck has a good child! Especially like the part about rarely disturbed anyone:)
6 year old...bed around 7:30pm, up at 6:30am, no naps
3 year old...bedtime and sleep time same as 6 year old...occasional nap, though has "quiet time" every day after preschool.
21 month old...bedtime 7pm, up at 6:30am...always has been our great sleeper...takes one nap a day (usually at 12:30 for about 2 hours)
The older two get tucked into bed with a story, prayer, and cuddles.
Good luck!
I want to hear what you have to say.
My parents were super-structured and 6 of their 7 kids went to bed according to the routine. I was their trouble.
Clinton's family didn't have structure - they went to bed when they wanted to, according to his memory, so he isn't big on bedtime. To add to that, he ofter works as late as 9:00.
We have a nearly-4-year-old and a 14-month old. They share a room. Between 9:00 or 9:30 (sometimes after 10:00) We put the tiredest one to bed. If 15 minutes doesn't quiet her down, we switch. Once the one is snoozing, we add the other.
If the baby wakes up in the night, we let her cry it out.
Lizzy doesn't usually wake up.
They sleep until 7:00 or 8:30.
Emma gets a nap after lunch, except on Sundays when she's super-ornery all through our 1:00 church.
Some days Lizzy crashes around 5:00 or 6:00 and that means a rough bedtime.
Trying to put them to bed earlier is usually just a fight and I give up long before they do.
I have friends who say, "Bedtime is 8:00. Lay down the law and they'll get used to it. Don't care if they're awake, but they're in bed."
Sounds nice, I suppose, but that hasn't worked for us.
This is Sarah, Jason's friend from high school. We have 2 little ones-"M" just turned 4. He has always been a HORRIBLE sleeper. He has rarely slept through the night and is bouncing off the walls until about 11 PM. This child only needs about 5 or 6 hours of sleep (wish I could be like that). They are required by law at day care to have a rest period so on the weekends we try to not have him nap because then we can get him to bed by about 9 PM. We're looking at ADHD and possibly OCD in the future. He has to have everything just so, so bed time can be exhausting. We finally gave in and bought a TV so he will stay focused on that and not worry about so many other things or get up and play with things in his room or wake up his little sister.
Getting to her, "O" just turned 2. She rarely sleeps through the night either. It has been better since we put them in separate rooms. If she takes a nap in the afternoon, it's for about 1 1/2 hours. We try to make her take one because if she doesn't, she wants to go to sleep before 9PM and then she'll wake up about 3AM ready to go. She gets the figets at night a lot and has to wind down. She can go from jumping on the bed to sound asleep in 10 minutes, but it has to be on her own time line.
When our kids were little, we tried every method--Ferber, etc--that I could find online or that the dr. suggested. After many months, he finally said some kids are just horrible sleepers and you happen to have one (we only had one at the time). Both of our kids would literally scream for HOURS--like 4 or 5--I'd have to leave and drive around while their dad handled it. They'd also throw up all over and that left us with a bigger mess to clean up.
Unfortunately, my husband works until at least ten, sometimes up to 1AM so I have do what I can and not sweat the small stuff. I work full time as a teacher so both kids get up at 6:30AM so we can be out the door on time. I swore I'd never be the mom to let the kids fall asleep with a sippy cup or to a tv but you have to do what you have to do when you are exhausted.
I was so glad to see that my kids are not the only ones who don't have regular sleeping patterns.
We have 2 boys and we have no set bedtime.
Knox goes to bed when he is ready and Boston goes to bed when he is ready. Even if we put Boston to bed at 8:00 he still wouldn't wake up till 10:00.
Knox is almost 3 and usually crashes around 9:00.
It is almost 10:00 and he is still awake tonight.
Boston stays up with dad watching TV, or anything not to go to bed.
One night when Grandma and Grandpa were here from Utah, everyone went to bed but Boston. I heard the TV on at 2:30. I came down stair and found Boston acting like he was asleep! Wide awake!
Knox wakes up at 7:30 just like clock work. He loves sleep.
Boston wakes up when you wake him up. Sometimes 10:00 sometimes 8:00. It doesn't make a difference. He hates going to bed, and hates getting up. Reminds me of a teenager!
I'm ready for the theory.
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