The Good Old Days

The other day was Wednesday....I have YW's on Wednesday. Jason used to have YM's and so this was a family event, but he was recently released and so I get to go alone now. It's funny how annoying it seems that YW is to him now though.

Oh...I got sidetracked...sort of...Wednesday....I had YW's, which is a regular thing, but I also had a work meeting at 8:00 and a Board Meeting at 8:30. So I was running the list by Jason and you could almost see his eyes rolling back in his head in annoyance. Annoyance at what? You all know what...especially those of us with little kids. Annoyance that your spouse has to be gone and you have to be home. Annoyance that they are seemingly given freedom and you are not. Annoyance that someone else is taking up precious time that you could be spending with your one and only truest love. You know....you're just annoyed. I've felt it too. I think we all have. Just tonight Jason asked if it was alright if he went to Home Depot. My response, "Why?" Like I had to make sure his reasons were really valid and that he wasn't going to do something fun and leave me alone to put kids in bed. Yeah, like that.

And somehow this made me think back to the good old days. You know the ones. You know right? When you were in love? Like gushingly, never stop thinking about, make sure your hair is done and your legs are shaved, in love? I remember when Jason and I had just started hanging out (I would say dating, but that would be putting a label on something that never actually happened). We were talking one day and he asked me what my plans for the night were. I had something for school and told him I could call him afterwards. He suggested picking me up. I remember the little jolt of fear rushing through me. It wasn't just a ride offer. It was an acceptance of having separate plans but trying to cross paths as soon as possible. It was the beginning of taking responsibility for each other. I remember another weekend....Jason got in a car accident. He called me to ask for a ride back to school. To ask for help. I remember the thrill of being the "ONE" he would call for help. Ahhh...the good old days. When seperate lives were acceptable (after all how could you fault someone for having a life?) and we merely did all we could to conjoin them. No anger, no getting annoyed, just commonly trying to be together as often as possible.

Why is it that marriage produces guilt and blame? My favorite saying of Jason's is this....are you ready?..."Same team. Same team." It's his gentle way of reminding me that we have the same goals...we're trying to get to the same place...and we're trying to do it together. Yeah, he's right. Same team. Same team.