...was the title of the article to ANNIE in today's paper (which I don't normally read, but after checking out the recipes for nutty mint chocolate squares, I moved on to the next page).
It had to be about someone cheating on their spouse and it was and I was thinking, "Good, at least she told them to tell the truth." NOPE!
This guy, who is 67 and now retired, had formed a relationship with some lady at work. He now worries that his wife is becoming suspicious and the next time he saw his affair-partner-co-worker he told her that it was over because he has come to realize how much his marriage means to him and that "my wife seems less trustful of me than ever before in our 46 years of marriage. I've seen a change come over her that hurts me..." His next statement is "Since I'm fairly positive my wife knows nothing of Mary, what possible purpose would it serve to tell her now? I've ended it permanently. Am I a coward for not coming clean? I fear the outcome if I confess."
Okay, so here ya go, ANNIE, give him you great advice and tell him to fess up..."If you have broken it off completely, it's time to show your wife some devotion. Be attentive and appreciative. Give her no reason to doubt you. You don't have to bring up the affair, but if your wife should question you directly, you must tell her the truth. Lying on top of the betrayal would be more than she could forgive."
WHAT!!! Hello? Where are your morals? If your husband had an affair with someone would you really want him to not tell you? And am I the only one that sees a problem with this? Not telling her IS LYING! Just because someone doesn't ask you directly doesn't mean you are not lying to them. If you brake someone's window and walk away and tell yourself that you will confess if they ever confront you, your are not telling the whole truth. Seems like a simple primary principle to me. Plus it really irritates me that the guy fears the outcome of his sin more than he values fessing up and properly setting things right.
Anyway, it made me wonder...would I want my husband to tell me? Would you want yours to tell you? In my opinion, if would go a lot better for him with a repentant attitude than me suspecting and wondering and maybe even finding out for myself. What about you?
5 comments:
I think it would destroy and hurt the marriage more than what has already happened if he didn't fess up. It would be tough to hear, but then you could work through it together and it could make a marriage stronger - it would take awhile but it could happen. I know a few people have been through this and made it and are happier than ever. It was hard. It took years and tears, but they made it. In repentance, confession is key, and I actually think not telling would hurt the man more than the wife - it would just eat him up. But what do I know? Thankfully I haven't been through tihs in my marriage and I can't imagine Oby doing this to me. But I bet this man's poor wife thought the same thing too at one point. SAD!
Oh I'm here for selfish purposes too. I now have a kidz button and I'm asking all my friends and fam to add it to their sidebars to help me let people know about it. Head over to my blog to find out how to add it. Yeah, I'm shameless for sure! Love ya!
I would want my husband to tell me-then I would get to decide the next step. I agree with you Annie missed the boat, she gave this guy some very poor advice.
I'm baaaaack! he he he
I just wanted to let you know Mialee's story is up today. I think it turned out great - the pictures add so much because she's such a doll!
I wanted to know - do you want a link to your personal blog? Either way is fine with me, it's just up to you. Some people like it - some people are like 'no way!'
Love ya girl!
ps We still have the stomach bug over here at our house. Be glad we didn't come spread the love, er germs. ;O)
Not knowing the whole truth could be bliss for the wife. I would want every gory detail if I knew and that could get ugly. Though I do think part of the repentance process is telling the person that you have wronged. I would not want to walk 1 minute in those shoes.
I would want to know! Although I wouldn't want to know - or rather I wouldn't want it to have happened. But if I ever found out on my own and he hadn't told me, his not telling me would almost be more unforgiveable.
Post a Comment